Jamaica is a beautiful country with many
beautiful, hard-working people. There is, however, a major
problem with Jamaica, the Hustler. The Hustler is
a guy that trolls the beach, or more commonly sits in one
place waiting to try pressure you into buying anything that
you do or don't want. The first two times I went there,
the Hustlers were tormenting, with their incessant begging
I'm not talking about Rastafarians, most Rastas don't bother
anyone else, they live humble lives in the hills. I've heard
as many as 60% of Jamaicans were either Rastafarians or
Rastafarian sympathizers. But I would believe that less
than 1% of Jamaicans are Hustlers.
The first time I went, I started thinking that all Jamaicans were
Hustlers, but the next time I went, I got to see another side,
a non-tourist town (Lucea), which only had one guy that followed
us around, and he really wasn't even begging.
The beautiful white sand beaches of Negril, Jamaica
|This time, I wasn't a smiley-eyed, happy-go-lucky, foreigner,
like I was before, and it paid dividends. The locals seem
to disrespect the happy tourist. I learned this last time,
as the days went on, I slowly started loosing my patience,
and the locals slowly stopped their harassment.
This time, I wasn't harassed even once, when someone started,
I looked them dead in the eye and said emphatically, "No
thanks!", I didn't have any problems.
I got it down to a science this time, navigating through people
without looking at them.. It worked well to act like I didn't
understand, or that I couldn't hear them right. Remember,
I'm only talking about the hustlers, not the regular Jamaican
How embarassing it must be for the average Jamaican
to have their national image degraded by these human-sized mosquitos.
In the taxi, on the way down to Negril, I was talking to the driver
about a movie idea I had. I call the movie "Jamaican Batman".
The movie is about a local that gets so sick of the Hustlers that
he starts taking the law into his own hands, and just starts beating
the hell out of them. He doesn't dress up or anything, but he
becomes a sort of super folk hero to Jamaica. I told the driver
that, Jamaican Batman isn't "fair". If he thinks you
look like a Hustler, he's going to punish you. He is caught by
the police, but the sheriff, in a touching moment, lets him go
and tells the public (Who loves him) that he must have escaped.
The sheriff sees him again on the street, and just nods and continues
The driver loved the idea, and told me that he wanted to be Jamaican
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